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Owners Box: Ben Roethlisberger Struggling With New City Ordinance That Allows Food Trucks On Field
Date:  10/16/2014
Title:  Owners Box: Ben Roethlisberger Struggling With New City Ordinance That Allows Food Trucks On Field
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Ben Roethlisberger is struggling to maintain focus after a new city ordinance started allowing food trucks ...
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Report: Many Companies Now Offering Women Permanent, Unpaid Maternity Leave
Date:  10/16/2014
Title:  Report: Many Companies Now Offering Women Permanent, Unpaid Maternity Leave
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA As part of a nationwide effort to accommodate women in the workplace, many U.S. companies are now ...
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SPONSORED: New Video Game ‘Horrifying’ For Anyone Who’s Never Experienced Terror Of Real Life
Date:  10/15/2014
Title:  SPONSORED: New Video Game ‘Horrifying’ For Anyone Who’s Never Experienced Terror Of Real Life
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Reviewers agree: The Evil Within reaches an unprecedented level of terror, assuming that the player ...
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Old Guy At Hostel Down To Party
Date:  10/9/2014
Title:  Old Guy At Hostel Down To Party
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Obama is currently being chased around in the background of a Secret Service hearing, U.S. officials ...
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Jaguars Hoping To Impress Florida State Football Scouts Attending Game Sunday
Date:  10/6/2014
Title:  Jaguars Hoping To Impress Florida State Football Scouts Attending Game Sunday
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitte.
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The Onion Reviews Gone Girl
Date:  10/3/2014
Title:  The Onion Reviews Gone Girl
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA The Onion's movie critic Peter K. Rosenthal reviews 'Gone Girl' in this week's Film Standard. Like Th...
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Climate Self-Conscious About All The Changes That Are Happening To It Right Now
Date:  10/1/2014
Title:  Climate Self-Conscious About All The Changes That Are Happening To It Right Now
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA 7.1 billion people demonstrate in favor of global warming, Obama now sleeps with a Louisville Slugger.
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Congressman Embroiled In Sexting Scandal Explains: I Wanted That Girl To See My Penis
Date:  9/30/2014
Title:  Congressman Embroiled In Sexting Scandal Explains: I Wanted That Girl To See My Penis
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA David Connors sits down for an exclusive interview with Congressman Bart Handford, who is finally ope.
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Owners Box: Didn’t I Predict Jeremy Macklin Would Have A Huge Week? Didn’t I Fucking Say That?
Date:  9/30/2014
Title:  Owners Box: Didn’t I Predict Jeremy Macklin Would Have A Huge Week? Didn’t I Fucking Say That?
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA OSN's fantasy guru, Perry Bigwell, the soothsayer, the prince of light of fantasy football, fucking t...
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16,000 Stained During Messiest Day In U.S. History
Date:  9/30/2014
Title:  16,000 Stained During Messiest Day In U.S. History
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Experts confirm the British Empire will be reduced to 8 square acres around Buckingham Palace by ...
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Teacher Who Learns More From Her Students Than She Teaches Them Fired
Date:  9/30/2014
Title:  Teacher Who Learns More From Her Students Than She Teaches Them Fired
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Explaining that her statements indicated a failure to understand and implement the district's goal of...
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Owners Box: Tips For Winning Your Fantasy League In What Is Now Clearly The NFL’s Final Season
Date:  9/30/2014
Title:  Owners Box: Tips For Winning Your Fantasy League In What Is Now Clearly The NFL’s Final Season
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Perry Bigwell says you should tune out the NFL's inevitable collapse and focus on winning your fantas...
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Roger Goodell Insists He Still Hasnt Seen Ray Rice Video
Date:  9/17/2014
Title:  Roger Goodell Insists He Still Hasnt Seen Ray Rice Video
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA The NFL announces a new zero-tolerance policy on videotaped domestic violence, a puzzled nation ...
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CEO Says Office Shooting Could Not Have Come At A Worse Time For Company
Date:  9/17/2014
Title:  CEO Says Office Shooting Could Not Have Come At A Worse Time For Company
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA A tragic scene in Virginia as a gunman opened fire at the offices of SlashForward Marketing. Managers.
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Adjusting Several Sliders On Recording Studio’s Mixing Console Pays Off Big Time
Date:  9/11/2014
Title:  Adjusting Several Sliders On Recording Studio’s Mixing Console Pays Off Big Time
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitte.
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Child Development Experts Say Boys Not Fully Mature Until Avenging Father’s Murder
Date:  9/11/2014
Title:  Child Development Experts Say Boys Not Fully Mature Until Avenging Father’s Murder
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Citing the central role the process plays in cognitive development, a study released Thursday by the ...
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Owners Box: Don’t Drop All Domestic Abusers From Your Roster Just Because Of Ray Rice Suspension
Date:  9/11/2014
Title:  Owners Box: Don’t Drop All Domestic Abusers From Your Roster Just Because Of Ray Rice Suspension
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA OSN's fantasy guru, Perry Bigwell, says owners should keep the domestic abusers on their team since t.
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Owners Box: Screws, Mangled Joints That Make Up Rob Gronkowski Poised For Huge Fantasy Year
Date:  9/11/2014
Title:  Owners Box: Screws, Mangled Joints That Make Up Rob Gronkowski Poised For Huge Fantasy Year
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Onion Sports Network's fantasy guru, Perry Bigwell, says owners should take a risk on the bolted-toge...
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Earth Down To Last Cubic Meter Of Resources
Date:  9/2/2014
Title:  Earth Down To Last Cubic Meter Of Resources
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA An unpopular police officer thinks about committing a racially motivated offense for a little support...
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Horrified Subway Execs Assumed People Were Buying Footlongs To Share With A Friend
Date:  9/2/2014
Title:  Horrified Subway Execs Assumed People Were Buying Footlongs To Share With A Friend
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA The sandwich chain says it is 'deeply sorry' if customers mistakenly believed that eating an entire f...
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GOP Maintains Solid Hold On Youth That Already Look Like Old Men
Date:  8/27/2014
Title:  GOP Maintains Solid Hold On Youth That Already Look Like Old Men
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA The Republican Party may have an insurmountable lead among young voters who dress and act like ...
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GM Recalls 600,000 Vehicles For Faulty Car-Detonators
Date:  8/26/2014
Title:  GM Recalls 600,000 Vehicles For Faulty Car-Detonators
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Like The Onion on Facebook: http://www.fb.com/theonion Follow The Onion on Twitter: http://www.twitte.
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U.S. Forest Service Kills Off Smokey Bear To Get People Serious About Fire Safety
Date:  8/22/2014
Title:  U.S. Forest Service Kills Off Smokey Bear To Get People Serious About Fire Safety
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA Hoping to reinforce their fire safety message, the U.S. Forest Service debuted a brand new ad campaig.
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Salt Lake City Hoping To Boost Tourism By Reminding Visitors They’re Free To Leave At Any Time
Date:  8/22/2014
Title:  Salt Lake City Hoping To Boost Tourism By Reminding Visitors They’re Free To Leave At Any Time
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA In a move designed to help the metropolitan area attract more tourists, Salt Lake City officials unve...
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Study: Nations Third-Graders Now Eating At A Ninth-Grade Level
Date:  8/19/2014
Title:  Study: Nations Third-Graders Now Eating At A Ninth-Grade Level
Description:  Subscribe to The Onion on YouTube: http://bit.ly/xzrBUA A local man feels even lazier when he thinks about how much ISIS has accomplished this year, a police.
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